Ah impatience.... it is a slow acting, yet deadly poison to relationships, especially relationships with men. It seems there exists a short program in the subconscious of many men that when a woman goes faster than he does it waves a red flag that says "this is not the one, this is not the one, danger Will Robinson, danger, danger!" In any case, we try to hide it, disguise it, cover it up like cat shit, but impatience is slippery and fast and will sneak out, peep out, creep out before you can say "WTH!?!"
What on earth are we to do with the relationship killer - impatience? First realize what it is.... It is only the brain saying "I can't be happy until" (he makes a commitment, stops hanging out with the guys, says I love you... whatever). That would be fine but when he perceives we want him to hurry up, that usually makes him feel compelled to slow down. The dance becomes a chase. The chase burns the relationship to a crisp.
So how are we to kill impatience before it kills another relationship? We make a liar out of our brain every time it tells us we can't be happy until x, y or z... right then we must, Must, MUST right then, do something thrilling, exciting or luxuriant. Because impatience is just your brain insisting you can't be happy until x, y or z happens, so when you do something right then that makes you happy right then.... after a few times your brain says... "Oh yeah, yes I can too be happy before I get x, y, z or whatever.... I do that all the time. I've made a habit of it." And that stops the lie. Impatience is a lie we tell ourselves. Proof is what cures impatience and it is the only thing that cures impatience except losing interest. And I don't think you're ready to lose interest or you wouldn't be here reading this right now.
What on earth are we to do with the relationship killer - impatience? First realize what it is.... It is only the brain saying "I can't be happy until" (he makes a commitment, stops hanging out with the guys, says I love you... whatever). That would be fine but when he perceives we want him to hurry up, that usually makes him feel compelled to slow down. The dance becomes a chase. The chase burns the relationship to a crisp.
So how are we to kill impatience before it kills another relationship? We make a liar out of our brain every time it tells us we can't be happy until x, y or z... right then we must, Must, MUST right then, do something thrilling, exciting or luxuriant. Because impatience is just your brain insisting you can't be happy until x, y or z happens, so when you do something right then that makes you happy right then.... after a few times your brain says... "Oh yeah, yes I can too be happy before I get x, y, z or whatever.... I do that all the time. I've made a habit of it." And that stops the lie. Impatience is a lie we tell ourselves. Proof is what cures impatience and it is the only thing that cures impatience except losing interest. And I don't think you're ready to lose interest or you wouldn't be here reading this right now.